They are watching you!
In this mini series I will share some of my leadership savvy which I have learned and successfully applied during the past 27 years in international kitchens around the world. If you want to know more then click here: Leadership skills can be learned, that’s the good news!
I have had the great honour and pleasure to be mentored by Chef Garry, my American mentor. My 18 months I spent under his watch and guidance has left a big mark on me. It was a defining moment for my career. It was a turning point in my life. Before coming to America, I did not waste a single thought on leadership. I probably did not even know what that word meant. Even if I did, I would have not cared about it. That all changed when I met Chef Gary. Things would never be the same as before.
A big part of leadership is the development of your employees. It is your responsibility to train, coach and if you can, mentor them. You are not a leader if you do not teach, train and coach. As a leader you are many things at the same time. Here is the tricky thing:
I think that a big chunk of learning happens unconsciously. Influencing people is a subtle matter. I am referring to the concept of “Leading by Example”.
I remember a conversation I had with Chef Garry. We talked about how leaders are perceived by their peers. He said:
“Your staff is watching you all the time Marcel. You must become aware of this.”
“It took me sometime to adapt to it. As a boss you have high status. This is normal group behaviour. Believe it or not, your people know more about you than you know about them. We always look up the hierarchy. This is what happens in the animal kingdom too. Leaders control the outcome. A certain outcome affects your life. Therefore, people want to collect data of those with influence.”
“You are constantly under scrutiny Marcel” , Chef Garry continued. “Look at yourself. What do you do when I am around? First, you want to know if I am around at all, am I right?” Chef Garry asked with a wink.
“That’s right. I want to know what the big boss is doing. Is he working today? Is he in a good mood? Did he say hi to me? If he did not say hi to me, then why? Perhaps he does not like me? Maybe he is angry with me?” I replied.
“Exactly Marcel,” the chef continued. “Every behaviour will be noticed. Every word you say will be registered. People do not want to take something with a pinch of salt. Are you smiling? No? Why not? Why is he always talking to Mary but not to Robert? Is he preferring her over him? Your staff will study your body language. And finally, of course, they will talk about you big time when you are not around. Keep this all the time in mind Marcel, it will be especially useful. You will not always manage to do it but practice it.”
Chef Garry was 100% right. When he taught me that lesson in 2004, I was way too young to comprehend what it really meant. Just in recent years I realized the importance of this role model concept. I had constantly underestimated it. As a matter of fact, I forgot about Chef Garry’s lessons and was not aware of it for many years.
Chef Garry reminded me: “It boils all down to self-leadership. Are you able to lead yourself?”
When I look back now, I am just aghast sometimes. I do not want to be so hard on myself, but I really did some stupid things. It is no wonder that I developed a certain image. People were watching me all the time exactly as Chef Garry had predicted. I was not aware of this at all, believe me.
Thanks for reading my post!
Marcel
This post was originally published on: https://www.marcelr.com/post/they-are-watching-you
